After all that, I was extremely stressed, both about bills and my mother. I was told, "There's no point in worrying about it; it's not like you can do anything about it." Picture the sound of a slamming cell door on Alcatraz. That is what it felt like happened to my emotions. A door slammed shut, and I was unable to feel anything.
Now that my life is back on track, I have been taking the time to grieve. Not only for the loss of my mother, but I also needed time to grieve the loss of a love I had come to learn was naught but a false illusion. Regardless, it tore my heart apart and time alone is putting it back together.
It is important to remember that just as we celebrate the joyous moments in life; we also need to grieve the horrendous losses. Pretending that the past doesn't exist, that it didn't happen, only buries the pain. It doesn't dispel it or mitigate it over time. The loss of my mother is something from which I shall never truly recover from but the pain lessens with each day and the memories will always be with me.
Take the time you need to grieve your losses. It is your pain and time limits or grief restrictions are not the place or right of anyone else. Only you can tell when you are truly healed. Do not let anyone dictate otherwise.