My Most Hated Word

I am 49 years old.  And without being excessively morbid, the reality is that I am running out of time.  Time to do the things that make me happy, time to spend with the people I love, time to surround myself with the people who love me.

So my most hated word?  Should.  All the things we were raised to think we had to do.  All the things we do on a daily basis because it's expected of us.  All the things we do because we are ingrained that they are the "proper" or "right" thing to do.  All the things society says are the things to wear, to look like, to be.

Stop for a moment.  Think about all the crap (and I mean crap) you do on a daily basis because you should.  How much of your life does it eat up?  How much time and joy would you regain by eliminating them?

I am no longer young.  I am running out of time.  So a lot of things I "should" do have to go.  I will no longer spend my time accommodating family members who's greatest pleasure in life is to criticize me.  I will no longer spend my precious time making plans with friends who cancel, show up late, or put all the planning on me.  I will no longer spend my days pleasing others and making myself miserable in the process.

From now on, I will do what feeds my intellect.  I will do what soothes my soul.  I will do what brings joy to my heart.  I will surround myself with people who love me and who's love does not come with expectations and demands.  I will love the same way.  Time is short.